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Now, I’m not saying these are conscious reasons why dating a man quite a bit older—there have been several moments when I’ve thought that going out with someone closer to my age would be much simpler.
I even tried it when my boyfriend and I took a short break, and I found it was painstakingly difficult and more complicated than my experience dating an older guy. The texting games (How long should I wait to text him back? It’s exhausting), the fear of commitment that plagues most twentysomethings, and the simple fact that most guys my age aren’t as emotionally mature as I am.
This alone is a reason why I refuse to go back into the dating pool with guys my own age. When I’m out, the guys I seem to attract are generally in their mid- to late-30s. To find out why, I asked a straight twentysomething male friend, who pointed out that younger guys are simply intimidated.
After all, going up to a total stranger in a bar and making an impression isn’t easy, and it takes a certain amount of confidence, which often comes with age.
And continued to call when he said he would and replied to messages fairly quickly.
In general, dating games are rather boring to a guy who’s probably had his fair share.
One thing I’m incredibly grateful for is not having to deal with jealousy in my current relationship.
Sure, it occasionally happens, but my boyfriend understands that being in a codependent relationship leads to all sorts of trouble and that spending time apart sometimes is key.
As Aaliyah once said, “If at first you don’t succeed, dust yourself off and try again.” Older men know this. I won’t lie: It can be annoying at times dating someone who has “been there/done that,” but it can also be helpful when your partner can use his experiences to guide you.It can be tough when you and your older partner can’t share childhood commonalities (dude’s never read a book!?), but the benefits can certainly outweigh those little things.Anyone who’s been in a serious long-term relationship knows the journey isn’t without certain challenges, and when you’re dating an older man—we’re talking a decade or more—things can get even trickier.I know this firsthand, as I’m 25 years old, and I’ve been dating an older guy nearly 15 years my senior for almost four years.