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The latest installment of the Scary Movie franchise includes send ups of Paranormal Activity, Mama, Sinister, The Evil Dead, Inception, Black Swan and pop culture featuring Ashley Tisdale, Charlie Sheen, Lindsay Lohan, Snoop Dogg, Katt Williams, Molly Shannon, Terry Crews, Simon Rex, Jerry O'Connell, Sarah Hyland, Katrina Bowden, Tyler Posey, Shad Moss aka Bow Wow, Kate Walsh, Heather Locklear, Mac Miller and Mike Tyson.Scary Movie V is directed by Malcolm Lee who teamed up and worked side by side with legendary comedy director David Zucker (Airplane, The Naked Gun franchises).The family's hispanic maid (Lidia Porto) is fat, has hairy arms, wears a bikini, and farts so hard she blows herself off the toilet.I don't know what movie that's a reference to, but the presence of farts and toilets makes it COMEDY GOLD®!There is a section based on Evil Dead where Jody and her ballet friend Kendra (Erica Ash, in a role clearly intended for Scary Movie stalwart Regina Hall, who declined to appear) stand in the basement of a cabin and recite the evil-summoning incantation, causing the teens upstairs to mutilate themselves.Then they speak the word that ends it, and the teens go back to normal.I'd be tempted to say that nothing in Scary Movie 5 is funny, but the outtakes that play over the closing credits show multiple cast members struggling to keep from laughing, so obviously I'm mistaken. Maybe there was a problem with the projection at my theater?Because what I saw was a boldly uninspired torrent of halfhearted slapstick, interminable poop jokes, and pointless pop-culture references, a veritable tsunami of idiocy cutting a swath of disgust and boredom across the landscape.
"I have a court date in the morning," Lindsay says, just one of several thousand lines she and Charlie have that make reference to their real-life misadventures.
Basically, you've seen all of this activity before.
But with big box office numbers on each outing, it seems many moviegoers don't mind that at all. The photo gives us a look at the upcoming Scary Movie 5, and shows Sheen and Lohan in a somewhat cozy situation.
That's Mama (released three months ago) and the Paranormal Activity franchise.
To bond with one of the little girls, Jody resumes her ballet career (there's your Black Swan), which leads to nothing worthwhile in terms of story, parody, or laughter.