Dating ideas for asking out
Hmm would be interesting to hear the philosopher bloggers on PT debate this.
I never said people are poor victims or robots, but I stand by my points and as I stated in a previous post, people are different, thus they have differing ideas as to what constitutes being honest and open and not feeling that the person who is asking for a date is doing so under false pretences.
Welcome back to The Attraction Doctor Although asking for a date directly can have a good chance of success (see articles Part I here, and Part II here), it can also be awkward and difficult.
Therefore, some people prefer to take a more "indirect" approach to asking out a love interest (especially those who are shy or have some social anxiety).
I have been able to get him to ask outright and re-shape his approach, but it takes months. It is weird, so I see it as disingenuine and manipulative. If someone I liked used these techniques on me, in the inside I would laugh... But I understand other people have more serious bents. When people are shy and they like someone they could feel so nervous that it could be very difficult for them to seem open, friendly and honest even if they are.
These usually take the form of a question - which then doesn't "box the other person into a corner". So, with everyone informed as to different styles, each can make intelligent choices and find who they like. They are actually similar to the way you would communicate with a friend and someone you are close to and comfortable with.
Perhaps these lighter additions will offer a wider range of options. You usually take it for granted that getting together is a given that both sides equally want and would enjoy. You shouldn't really need so-called techniques to manipulate and coerce people into dating.
So, after providing caveats, I then leave it up to the individual reader whether they prefer to be more forthright or indirect in their methods. A former colleague tried this on me a couple of times, it made me so uncomfortable I finally cut off all contact.
For those who prefer more direct methods, my earlier articles on "Just Asking" might be a better fit: Just Asking for It! Part II: Why Dating Partners Say Yes Cristina - Thanks again for your input. To this reader, there is nothing fun, flirtatious or light-hearted about manipulating a conversation or a situation or provoking a response that you want. The original examples were designed as "strong" interpretations of the technique.