Animal sex dating personal
The thing women are told they can access any time is, maddeningly, often just out of reach.Even in research about appropriate dating behavior among adults today, “men and women both agree that men should actively pursue female partners and that women should be passive recipients to their advances,” says Jessica Carbino, a Ph. candidate in sociology at UCLA who studies online dating and relationships.We all get that the rules of traditional courtship — in which men make every single advance and women demur or acquiesce — are dead, but we haven’t replaced them with a new standard operating procedure. “Women want sex, but they don’t want to be seen as forward (or worse, desperate).Men want sex but are intimidated, unconfident, or don’t want to be seen as domineering.It’s not clear whether they orgasm, but “female rats do what feels good,” a researcher explains.
Moreover, when women do not adhere to these scripts they are viewed negatively.
But when I read Daniel Bergner’s description of rat clitorises — one of the more fascinating sections of his totally engrossing new book, , out this week — for once I felt a serious connection with the animal kingdom.
Here are some facts about female lab rats: During sex, a female rat will evade her partner, darting away in the midst of his pumping, so it doesn’t end too quickly — she wants it to last, because it’s more pleasurable for her that way.
A German researcher “shows women and men in new relationships reporting, on average, more or less equal lust for each other.
But for women who’ve been with their partners between one and four years, a dive begins — and continues, leaving male desire far higher.” We fundamentally misunderstand women’s lust, says Bergner. Bergner explains that, in the past, “scientists fixated on what the rat female did in the act of sex, not what she did to get there.” And if you’re friends with any single women or are one yourself, you know that “what she did to get there” is often the most taxing part of the sexual act.